BLOG 6

2A. In the reading Heasly’s: Queer masculinities of Straight Men
I can really apply this to a man in my life. This idea that men consider other men to be gay because they do “gay-like” things for example if they support gay rights and if they do not like sports they are portrayed as gay. My best friend is what can be called the “gayest-straight man” there is. However, in high school because he like music theater, dance, and he is a huge supporter of equal rights and supports gay rights, a lot of the boys/men in high school would refer to him as gay. I think it is weird that men are so negative and uncomfortable with men who have “gay-like” qualities. I also think it is a little funny how some men feel so uncomfortable with someone who is possibly gay. It is also funny how they feel that their masculinity in some way is threatened by the presents of somebody who portrays to be gay.

1A. To me it was really interesting and new was the idea that effeminate was so bashed upon in both the straight culture and the gay culture, something pointed out in Sissyphobia… I thought it was different how gay men bashed on other gay men for being “too gay” or more of the concept of being to feminine, I think that because gay is connected to being feminine which is “girl behavior”. I believe that maybe that is why is it looked down upon. To be a woman is considered to be weak and this is why being to feminine is so bad because no one wants to be considered weak. I also think it is sad that not all the gay community unites, because in reality they are all the same and all want to be equal and not be discriminated, however, they discriminate within each other, which I think is sad.

1B. An idea that makes sense to me is what Hennen’s points out in Bear, bodies are shaped by the type of work done I think this is true bodies are shape by what people do everyday. I also think that it is true the working class man has the stereotype of being hyper-masculinity. However, there are people that have very no physical jobs are still able to keep a good shape.

Blog #5

Blog #5
2a. hooks talks about loving men and how men do not really show emotion and she gives the example of her mother and father relationship “…Mama’s anger masks her fear that any day now she could die and wouldn’t have ever left loved by the man she dedicated her entire life to pleasing…”(hooks ch.11). I can really connect to what she is saying to men in my life, I have an uncle and he is so emotionless he hardly explains what he feels and never says how he is feeling. I do feel that when he and my aunt get into a fight, I feel that she is feels that after being with him for 25 years of being married she has never felt that love. I feel that after so many years of marriage she is still like a young girl craving for her boyfriends attention. It is sad how she has been married with my uncle so long and still she does not have the little small emotion of love, I do not doubt that my uncle loves his wife, but, would it me so hard to say it once?

1b. hooks points out something that is a new perspective to me that makes this significant point. hooks talks about how in a way she feels sorry for men because they see how patriarchy wounds them yet men remain exact to the patriarchy culture. (ch. 7) A lot of men cannot live up to the “being a man” standards, and they are considered outsiders, they are even isolated at times. But, instead of trying to fight against the system and those standards, that are out of reach and only destroy men, they go way out of their way to try to fit into this “real man” box. It is kind of say that something that hurts a man so much but yet they want to do anything to be part of that culture.

1c. Thomson points out that to start making difference in our young men’s lives we have to start socializing boys like girls and do not really agree with this idea. I think that just because girls are raised to show more emotion and have different behaviors it does not necessary take them away from that patriarchal thinking. Many women are born and brought up with that patriarchal and misogyny thinking. I just do not believe that because you are born and raised a girl that your are automatically going to be this non-patriarchal feminist person. I believe that both girls and boys should be raised them same, that girls when they are little should do some “boy” activities and boys should be involved in some “girl” activities. I do not believe that by raising our boys like girls would solve the problem, mostly because a lot of the women in our society who are raising our kids are still founded on concepts of misogyny and patriarchy.

1c. Katz points out something that I can really connect it with a male in my life my brother. Katz talks about how men are uncomfortable with other men’s abusive behaviors, and how men would like to help the cause, but, they do not know how or where to go for ideas or events. Recently after the kid knapped Chelsey King, my brother was so mad at the man so murder and rapped Chelsey King and he said “I wish there was a way to help either a way to help the family or a way to help stop other similar cases…” I think that a lot men really dislike men who abuse of women and it is frustrating to men that they feel like they cannot help the issue. Maybe it there was more awareness about the issue maybe more promotion, I think that would help men become aware and want to participate in the issue of abuse towards women.

Blog #4

BLOG #4

1a/b. (Ch. 1) This idea behind that the United States (society) continues to produce thousand of physically and emotionally abusive men. This is something that really makes sense to me. I completely agree with it. I never made this connection that we were making men to be this way, but, we are just by how men are portrayed in the media, strong, dominate. I think that since men are boys they are in a sense “programmed” to show this dominance over women, which leads boys when they become older to have this control over women, and some men show it through violence. This traditional way of raising men, is what is hurting women, we have to raise and teach this new generations of boys that violence towards women is not the answer. We have to break this traditional norms of how to raise boys, because if we do not we are going to continue to produce physically, emotionally abusive men.

2a. (Ch. 2) “…once you are aware of the degree that women that women suffer because of gender violence you cannot go about your business and pretend that everything is fine.” To me I believe that this is one of the most significant things that Katz says in the chapter, or maybe just something that I can really connect to a male in my life. I was recently talking to a friend and I was telling him about the reading and telling him about the crazy statistics about women violence. And to him it was absolutely shocking to realize these numbers, and how high they were. He was completely convinced that numbers for abused women had gone down, and that those high numbers did not exist, he was not aware of the real situation. Now, that he knows he wanted to get involved, he was asking me of things that he could do. I also think that he is not the only person like this, with this misunderstanding. So letting people know is a big step for people to take action.

2a. (Ch. 5) When Katz talks about still some women cannot confront men or hold them accountable about men violence. Katz talks about this struggle for women that idea that women do not want to be held accountable for bashing on men or being known as the man hater. I can really connect with this because prior to have taken other women studies course. I as always really skeptical about “trashing” on men because I was scared of what they would think of me I would not want them to think I hated them. But, is reality is that you have to be proud of what position you stand on issues, because if you set the example people will follow. I believe that a lot of women have a hard trouble understanding this idea, because I was one of these females. So I believe women should be proud about what they believe, and not care about the reactions of others because in a lot of situations they are not even true.

Blog #3

bell hooks (Ch. 3)
1c. An idea that does not make sense to me is when bell hooks talks about paternal sadism, “…paternal sadism is the natural outcome of patriarch values”. I know that sadism is a form of emotional starvation not given to children when they are infants/little. Does she mean paternal sadism is it the emotional care that a father does not give to his son and this somehow leads to the patriarchy values? But, I do not agree with this entirely because there are plenty of men that were raised my single mother, and never had a father figure and they were raised by patriarchal principles. I do not think it is necessary, that just males or father figures that enforce patriarchal values I think women also do as well.

C.J Pascoe (Ch. 1)
1b. An I idea that was very meaningful to me from this part of the reading was when Pascoe is going over the ideas that lay the foundation of the book. Pascoe talks about sexuality, gender, bodies, and she describes gender the best way I have heard so far. “…gender is accomplished through day-to-day interactions”. I had been having trouble exactly grasping this whole idea of how people “do gender”, but, the author through this made it clear that you “do gender” by what you do everyday how you communicate, how you talk, how you present, and overall how you present yourself. Now, I better understand how I personally show my gender or “do my gender”.

C.J Pascoe (Ch. 2)
2a. Something that Pascoe points out in this chapter is the idea that I can relate to my own experience is this idea that heterosexuality is institutionalizes, that all these ideas and practices that surround heterosexuality are taught and shown in school. I see the example that she gives in the chapter and those are some of the same everyday things that I experienced growing up. It is so expected school that boys should be fathers, girls should be mothers and they should all get married, have kids and repeat the cycle all over again. School is the primary source where boy are taught to act like boys, and girls are taught to act like girls. Because most of the time children have different personalities at home then they do at school. At school they must perform their assigned gender and at home they are safe and can be who they desire.

C.J Pascoe (Ch. 3)
1a. A new perceptive that I agree with is the idea that Pascoe points out the idea of radicalizing the fag. This is a new perspective to me, it is something that I was aware of but never really put a lot of thought into. This is something that I really notice especially in my high school years this identification of what is masculine for white and men of color is completely different. The definition of masculinity various tremendously among each race, Pascoe points out the one about black men and how it was a “necessity” and “a must for” black men to know how to dance, that through dance, they are able to show strength, and bravery. While on the other hand, dancing for white men represents as sissy and gay like. In my high school most of the men on the dance teach were men of color either, African American or Asian, there were no white males. Also when the men’s dance team would practice during lunch, many white males walked by, and often questioned or made gestures expressing their disapproval for this type of performance. For white men masculinity is defined in many other ways.

C.J Pascoe (Ch. 4)
2a. “boys…repeatedly enforce definitions of masculinity that included male control over female bodies through symbolic or physical violence.” This quote is something that I can relate to especially in my past life experiences. What Pascoe says about men performing masculinity through controlling the female is so true. I have been in many personal situations when I was younger where I have experienced men doing this. I believe men do this because usually women are weaker physically and men know that they can dominate them and win all the fights/confrontations. Also through this domination they can show that that they can concur what masculinity fights most which is femininity, by dominating a female (the live representation of femininity) physically they show that they are in control they can control their emotions as well as a female and they are performing themselves as they should very macho like and most importantly very manly.

Blog 1

1a. A new and different perspective that I agree with is something that Lorder and Moore point out in Gendered Bodies: Feminist Perspectives. They point out that men and women try to shape all aspects of their lives for example body, style, and posture into whatever their corresponding assigned gender. They try to show femininity or masculinity through their body, for example women try to be thin and curvy and men try to be tall, muscular. I never made the connection that people did this because we think it was our gender is supposed to look like. But in reality that is the only reason we change ourselves is because of our ideas of what our gender is suppose to look like.

1b. Something that was really meaningful to myself was what Lorber points out in “Night to His Day” The Social Construction of Gender . She says how human females can become husbands and vise versa without a surgery just as human infants can become reign as kings or queens. This statement is so meaningful because many men and women do this subconscience there are my single mothers and fathers that have to play both roles with their children. The comparison that is made with infants and kings and queens is good because playing both mother and father is not planed it is just assigned without a choice just as kings and queens are assigned.

2a. Something that I can really relate with my own life experiences is what Wichins points out in A Continuous Nonverbal Communication when she says that gender is primarily a system of symbols and meanings with are rules and privileges and punishments pertaining to masculinity and femininity. I notice these punishments and discrimination within my own family, for example, I have women in my family who are looked down a pond on because they have had many relationships, also because they do not correspond that cookie-cutter persona that their gender should look like.